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The Dementia Caregiver's Little Book of Hope [Kindle Edition]
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As “aging in place” becomes part of the new-millennial zeitgeist, seniors, as well as Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s patients, are choosing to stay at home as long as doing so is feasible and safe.
Even those who are able to remain living independently still rely on a minimum of assistance from neighbors or family members to perform the activities of daily living. As a result of this trend in growing older, the “caregiver” has become a popular substitute for serious medical assistance in the home.
A caregiver is anyone who provides help to another person in need such as an ill spouse or partner, a disabled child, or an aging relative. However, family members who are actively caring for an older adult often don’t self-identify as a “caregiver.” Recognizing this role can help caregivers receive the support they need.
Caregiving can offer many rewards. For most caregivers, being there when a loved one needs them is a core value and something many wish to provide.
But a shift in roles and emotions is almost certain. It is natural to feel angry, frustrated, exhausted, alone or sad. Caregiver stress — the emotional and physical stress of caregiving — is common.
Factors like having fewer years of formal education, living with the person for whom they are caring, social isolation and depression are often the beginnings of a syndrome known as “caregiver stress.”
The emotional and physical demands involved with caregiving can strain even the most resilient person. That’s why it’s important to take advantage of the many resources and tools available to help provide care for loved ones. When performing such life-giving tasks, it is difficult to remember that without taking care of oneself, taking care of anyone else is unhealthy and even impossible.
The National Institute on Aging shared ways to alleviate the stress incurred when taking care of a loved one. Some of those suggestions follow.
Accept help. Be prepared with a list of ways that others can help you, and let the helper choose what he or she would like to do. For instance, a friend may offer to take the person you care for on a walk a couple of times a week. Or a friend or family member may be able to run an errand, pick up your groceries or cook for you.
Focus on what you are able to provide. It’s normal to feel guilty sometimes, but understand that no one is a perfect caregiver. Believe that you are doing the best you can and making the best decisions you can at any given time.
Set realistic goals. Break large tasks into smaller steps that you can do one at a time. Prioritize. Make lists and establish a daily routine. Begin to say no to requests that are draining, such as hosting holiday meals.
Get connected. Find out about caregiving resources in your community. Many communities have classes specifically about the disease your loved one is facing. Caregiving services such as transportation, meal delivery or housekeeping may be available.
Join a support group. A support group can provide validation and encouragement as well as problem-solving strategies for difficult situations. People in support groups understand what you may be going through. A support group can also be a good place to create meaningful friendships.
Seek social support. Make an effort to stay well-connected with family and friends who can offer nonjudgmental emotional support. Set aside time each week for connecting, even if it’s just a walk with a friend.
Set personal health goals. For example, set goals to establish a good sleep routine, find time to be physically active on most days of the week, eat a healthy diet and drink plenty of water.
Many caregivers have issues with sleeping. Not getting quality sleep over a long period of time can cause health issues. If you have trouble getting a good night’s sleep, talk to your doctor.
See your doctor. Get recommended vaccinations and screenings. Make sure to tell your doctor that you’re a caregiver. Don’t hesitate to mention any concerns or symptoms you have.
Respite Care
It may be difficult to leave a loved one in someone else’s care, but it’s often necessary. In-home respite care might be able to send a caregiver on a regular basis to allow the primary caregiver time away from the home, or to rest or take care of personal business.
There are also adult centers that provide daily schedules of care and activity oriented events designed for adults with constant care requirements. Some of these facilities also care for children, and combining the two groups can be beneficial for both.
Short-term nursing homes might also be an option. Some memory care facilities and nursing homes accept short-term patients while the primary caregiver is away.
Sue Lamborn, Outreach and Community Relations Manager for Thrive Alliance, offered a simple plan to alleviate caregiver stress.
“Remember that you are not alone. There are resources out there designed to take care of the caregivers, and sometimes caregiving is the hardest job. People just don’t realize how taxing it can be,” she said.
